Isn't that insane?

So this blog is... Going to be very disconnected... Don't have a singular focus here, but we'll see what happens...

So I was having my prayer time, doing my usual guitaring and whatnot, and really, again, for the second night in a row, was having a really hard time feeling God's presence....  So I just started walking around, pacing, and just asked God to help me walk in His footsteps...  Not in anyone else's... Not in my amazing brother, or older brother, or any of my amazing sisters or parents, but in His footsteps... To place my feet where His are, and to learn to walk, talk, and think like Him....  God give me Your heart.....  Give me just a sliver of Your heart...  

So I went back to my chair and wrote this:

"In Your footsteps I will walk

Every step I take

In surrender I will live

Yet I won't wait

My life is Yours today

Every nuance of me

Lord here I am

I'm here... This is me"

I simply want my life to be what God wants my life to be....  

Here I am... My everything....

I then proceeded to lie down on the nasty dirt back there (sorry 'bout the wash, mom!), and within 5 seconds saw one of the longest and coolest shooting stars ever....  And just thought about how much God loves me... That He'd just send that down, just so I could know how much He loves me...  That the God that flung the stars, that died on the Cross, that leads me everywhere I go, did so all thinking of me....  And I just started to whisper, over and over again...

"You love me"

"You love me"

"You love me"

"You love me"

What a God that He could do that... Love... Freely... That everything I do is completely pointless... That, no matter what I do or don't do, that if I wait my entire life before commiting myself to God, He'll still welcome me as a long-lost son..  

That's the kinda God I wanna live my life for....